I’ve always been fascinated with metaphors that extend across every area of life. How river streams resemble our veins, how a tree’s rings resemble our fingerprints or wrinkles, how the galaxies resemble our very own eye.
As I continue to uncover who I am and want to be in this life, I find myself wanting to subscribe to a way of life that dances along with the rhythms of nature. Winters are seemingly getting harsher and harsher (thanks to the rapid acceleration of climate change), and summers getting hotter and hotter. I can’t seem to figure out if I should be as strong as a heavy rock or as light as a pebble that floats along the river.
At this point in life, I believe it can be beneficial to embody both of these qualities and everything in between. In Traditional Chinese Medicine, it is believed that having both qualities of yin and yang provide the greatest balance for you and I believe that this philosophy can extend across every area in life as well.
My very favorite and honestly most consistent symbol in nature is the sun and the moon. They embody the delicate balance between yin and yang in the way that they both coexist, yet allow each other the space to shine.
Okay, so why all the metaphors?
Because the name Citrus and Roots has so many metaphors within it that tell you so much about who I am and the way of life that I dance to. While I was visiting family in Jeju-do, South Korea this winter, I was caught in an intense snow storm and I thought it was beautiful that even with the dark weather, the sweetness in nature can be found in citrus. If you’ve been to Jeju-do, you know that they are known for their sweet tangerines with thin peels. Along with citrus, you can find the rainbow in root vegetables! This is nothing novel, but to me, it was a breakthrough realization I needed at this point in my life when the extremes of life (in this case, winters and summers), can feel a bit too much too handle at times.
How beautiful is it that nature signals to us to nourish ourselves with the bright colors that can be found growing on the earth, even when everything around us can feel grey and monochromatic?
I love how citrus and root vegetables can be a representation of the sun and moon in what we eat everyday.
For me, I feel so deeply connected to the meaning of the sun and the moon, and the meaning of citrus and roots. A few ways I feel the two flowing in parallel:
Between the sun and the moon, you have a whole day to live a life of joy.
Between the sun and the moon, you can find a rainbow within the storm.
Between the sun and the moon, you’ll find me, a rainbow of energy, of queerness.
Between citrus and roots, you have a whole nourishing meal to enjoy.
Between citrus and roots, you can find a rainbow within the storm.
Between citrus and roots, you’ll find me stuck between tasting sour to some and sweet to others.
Possibly the most important one to note is the last one of the two.
Being Chinese-American, with Korean and Taiwanese cultural heritage, and born from immigrant parents, I come from a very traditional family. My queerness and plant-based lifestyle can be two large points of opposition from the mainstream anywhere in the world. That is not to say that queerness and veganism didn’t exist and is a very new concept. Both of these have existed in their own sub-cultures that were more covert or not widely embraced. Whether that is underground queer culture in China that has existed for thousands of years, or vegetarianism in Buddhist and Hindu religions. However, there was always a mainstream that these sub-cultures inherently oppose.
This has been something I’ve struggled with in my life—the push and pull between embracing tradition and embracing change. If we really want to dive into it, what really is the definition of tradition?
If we are talking literally out of the Oxford Languages dictionary,
noun
1.
the transmission of customs or beliefs from generation to generation, or the fact of being passed on in this way.
this can leave little room for challenging or questioning whether or not these customs or beliefs still hold true in the time they are passed. More importantly, what dictates the tradition of an entire culture? There are so many sub-cultures that can be overwritten by the mainstream, so this can become very, very complex. Some overarching themes I’ve heard people normalize within “Asian culture,” (which by the way, is never a monolith, but I’ll use this as an example) is that your family will body shame you. I’ve experienced this multiple times, and this isn’t something to be normalized and it is time to move on. Same with misogyny, this can be very apparent as well, even in my own family. These “traditions” are harmful and shouldn’t be carried on just because it was there before you. This is likely an oversimplification, but what I want you to take away is that there is always room for growth and therefore, change while preserving the pieces of tradition that still serve you and those around you.
For me, that means not being afraid of tasting sweet to people who embrace who I am, and tasting bitter to people who don’t, queerness and all. It means fully embodying the rainbow of energy that I can be, even when it is more acceptable to take up less space, be more still, be more like someone I’m not.
For the people and earth, that means understanding that industrial agriculture and factory farming is harmful and so is our demand for it. While mainstream traditions can show us that eating meat is normal and drinking milk makes you strong, the opposition to that will tell you that eating a more plant-forward diet can reduce emissions, and reduce demand for products in the harmful industries. We hold so much power with where we put our money. Boycotts have proven to work again and again, all stemming from the work of the individual. I want to be clear that I don’t believe that it is within everyone’s privilege to participate in a boycott or have complete control over their lifestyle or diet. I am speaking to those who do have the privilege to do so. Not everyone has the privilege of choosing a lifestyle that reduces harm.
This is coming from someone that was vegan for a few years and then unraveled out of it in the past year because of the struggle I mentioned above. Struggling to make sense of my roots and who I am now and what values I hold that are different from the traditions my family held before. I started to question whether I was missing out on foods I grew up with and wondering if I was missing out on the medicinal properties that my mom always said came with eating certain animal products. I thought that maybe, I wasn’t meant to eat this way. I went on the journey to reverse my steps and try to figure out if I’ve lost myself in something that was too far off from the rest of my family (and even friends). But there is always more and more research coming out about the health benefits of having a plant-forward diet, how it is significantly better for the environment, and reduces animal and human exploitation. I’ve realized now that those are all things that are more important to me in the time that we are living in to actually help tackle those issues, rather than ignore them and hold on to a tradition that maybe was never mine to keep.
I’ve heard a few people judge foods based on authentic versus inauthentic when referring to foods that may or may not taste like their grandma’s or directly from their homeland. I think this mindset can be harmful because it isn’t really time or location dependent, most of the time. What if we swap out bok-choy with another mustard plant because it grows better in that zone? What if we use tofu skin instead of chicken because of the harm of factory farming? These are all things that demand evolution in the way that we eat. What matters most is that it was authentic to the passionate person who put love and care into making it with what they had on hand and around them. Using the term “traditional” may be more helpful as it can indicate that it uses exact or close to exact methods from the origins of which that dish was created with very little to no swaps. This is an important discussion to have, especially when striving for a plant-forward, or completely plant-based diet coming from cultures where it may not have been the norm. It can help you feel more validated in being proud of the food you make and consume.
I’m proud of the person I am and I am thankful for nature’s gift of citrus and roots for reminding me everyday of what I wish to embody. It can be scary to walk away from your roots, but you can always grow new ones in the soil you choose to make your home. I am now okay with breaking tradition and being the juicy citrus I was always meant to be.